So far this week, I was relieved that Syesha is still safe on Idol. I like her. Brook is running out of time...too many blunders! I think David A. is really growing in his performances...he is such a "kid" yet when he sings..man..it's great! I believe it will be the David's in the finale!
In other news, here is a funny....Becca and Kimmi are learning abou the water cycle... Evaporation - Condensation - Precipitation - Collection So, the other night at dinner, they were telling Daddy about what they had learned so far, and as Becca was listing the 4 stages in the cycle, she said, and I quote "Evaporation, Constipation " Ha! I was cracking up....she didn't even realize what she said...lol!!
We have gone to our second Life Group with members from church. I love it! It's so nice to be around other families that share so many of the same qualities we do! The girls really have a great time there too!
So, I was having a discussion yesterday with someone, and it really disturbed me. This person was telling me how I was being selfish, and judgemental. Am I? I don't see it that way....I'm hurt...and I'm angry...and yes, I admit it's really hard to think of forgiving those that have changed everything in my life as I know it in the blink of an eye....I "KNOW" in my head what God commands me to do...what He wants me to do...I just struggle with it right now. I really do long to extend grace, and pray blessings on those that have hurt me...I just don't feel that I can yet...I want to...I just can't. Does this make sense?
I know that there comes a point where we just need to let things go, and move on...I'm just not sure how to get there at this point. I know that I will...just not today...or actually this moment...God can do anything...He can take it all from me immediately, or tomorrow...or longer, I don't know...is this putting God in a box? Am I saying that I'm better at doing His job in this situation because I'm struggling so much...is it lack of trust? lack of faith? or just really, really hard?? I wish I knew...any input is welcome....
6 comments:
O.K., first of all you have to know that I'm struggling with a forgiveness issue myself so there is totally NO JUDGEMENT here whatsoever. Having said that, here's what I know about forgiveness. It's a command, not a suggestion. We don't have to wait for our feelings to catch up to our willingness to obey. If we can obediently offer forgiveness to someone, God will supply the feelings to go along with our obedience. What you are really doing when you forgive someone is giving up the right to seek revenge and also giving up the right to keep bringing it up. I don't think it's a one-time thing. It's not likely, at least in the case of bigger issues such as the one you are going through, that you are going to be able to one day say, "I forgive these people" and be done with it. It'll require a continual act of obedience to daily say, "Lord, I forgive ..... because that is what you have called me to do. Please fill me with the feelings to match my obedience to your call for forgiveness. Make sense? You are in my prayers, Kari.
It's not about judgment or being selfish. Every day of our lives we have opportunity to be angry and hurt. It is always a choice. God never said it would be easy, but it is very simple. (His laws are not too difficult He declares to us) Forgiveness just like love is an action not a feeling. It isn't about being ready to forgive. It is about "prompt obedience". Jesus said to forgive others as He has forgiven you. Nobody has the power to change anything in your life unless we let them. Circumstances change, and sometimes they change by the actions of others. However, Truth is Truth no matter what. Forgiveness is a gift from the Lord that sets us free and those who we forgive as well, even if they don't know. We aren't validating their behavior, just releasing them to the Lord. Setting the captives free so to speak and allowing God to do what He wants. We are to be doers of the Word and not hearers only, the the only solution is to do what He says and then our feelings will follow. Sometimes I have to forgive hundreds of times a day (at least that is what it seems) but the peace that passes understanding that comes from prompt obedience is so worth it. The Word says to set our eyes (hearts) on heavenly things not on earthly things. Trust me. I have to do this everyday or else succumb to the hurt, anger, bitterness, etc. Your last questions are is it lack of faith, lack of trust, or really, really hard. All three. When we trust God and have the faith of God, we will just "do" what He says, no questions asked. We will submit our will to His and "act" on what we "know". Then, the joy of the Lord comes flooding in, we understand we are no longer responsible for changing those other people who have hurt us, we can set our eyes on heavenly things, and get excited to all that He has designed us to be Today! Hard? Yes, but only when we are looking inward or downward. Look up! Set your eyes on the hills from where your help comes from. Our help comes from the Lord. But we can't receive His help when we are looking down. He didn't move, we did. I would rather soar like an eagle than peck like a chicken.
I must say that it's refreshing to see someone who is willing to admit that they aren't ready to forgive yet. It's much healthier than someone who pretends to have forgiven but never really works through the process. Have you heard that song, "I just want to be mad for a while?" Because somethings that's me. I'll get over it. I'll forgive. But WHEN I do it is between me and God. Don't let other people tell you differently. God doesn't command us to forgive for His sake, he commands it for our own sakes. You and God will get through this together, hon! We're praying for y'all! When are y'all going to come down and visit us?
John 20:23 "If you forgive the sins of any, they are fogiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained."
Whose Gospel is it? I'm not sure where someone came up with the idea that God commands us to forgive for our sakes not His and don't let anybody tell you differently. That is very bad advice. What does the Word say?
1 John 2:12 "I write to you, little children, because your sins are fogiven you for His name's sake."
Whose sake? Jesus sake! Read the Word and preach the Word not your opinion.
It is out of love that Jesus teaches us to forgive, in His time, not our own. You have today! You have no guarantee of tomorrow and what are you going to say to Jesus when you stand before Him? I wasn't ready to forgive? One comment says that it is healthier to forgive when you are ready. Where does it say that in the Word? The point is that when you promptly obey the Word of God, when you are intimate with Jesus, not satisfying your own desires, but the One who gave His life for you, you will forgive and then allow Him to tenderly walk you through the pain, hurt, disappointment. If you hang on to unforgiveness, you can't get the healing you richly deserve and He paid the price of His life for.
We must not make up a new Gospel to fit what is refreshing to us. We can trust God to refresh us when we come under His Wings. We must be doers of the Word not hearers only.
One last thought - Matthew 18:35 "So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not fogive his brother his trespasses."
What is it that He will do? Deliver you over to the torturers until you pay that which is due. Our torturers are anger, bitterness, hurt, pain, unjust feelings, etc. You only torment yourself through unforgiveness, and you keep those who have done you wrong in a prison as well. Get a kingdom mentality and understand the eternal significance of forgiveness. We have all been hurt, bad. Kari, I have went through everything you went through with church, with foster care, with lies and accusations. We deal with people every week who are in the muck and mire of "stuff" but God's Word never changes, and it always brings life.
We do deliverance ministry, and the main thing problem with Christians is their unwillingness to forgive because they aren't ready, can't, it's not fair, and the list goes on. Christians are sick emotionally and physically because they try to tell God and others how and when they will forgive. Christians take the advice of well-meaning people who sympathize with them much easier than taking the aocountability that will set them free. Do it the way God has provided us instruction in the Word, and you will find yourself healed and whole much sooner than if you wait until you feel like it. I'm done preaching. I just get really wired when people state their opinion rather than the Word, and then state that the Word says something it clearly does not say. A religious spirit is one who twists the Word of God to say what they want it to say. Let Holy SPirit minister truth to you from His Word and worship Him in Spirit and Truth and, Hallelujah, freedom comes and Jesus receives the Glory!
Kari I love you and I know you are struggling...you're not being selfish, it's being human and all the complexities that go along with..human....And shall I say, AMEN(!!!!!) after Rebekah's comment....I know we are told to forgive, it's the forgetting afterwords that is the difficult part or letting God, and the guilt that goes along with not being able to 'just do it' (thanks NIKE)...we can tell God we are seriously working on it (that's your discussion with Him and He'll walk with you, just don't walk away and say I will be back later:)) part of our human nature unfortunately, never easy but always a chance to grow. There's always a lesson/reason being taught...all learn at different rates/speeds but come to the conclusion in the end...it's your journey. I will walk with you....keep talking!
LOVE YOU!!!!
Kari, just remember that God is all about grace. And where there is grace, there is forgiveness. I can forgive only because I was first forgiven. I can extend grace because grace was extended to me. God loves us enough to let us work things out in time. And I really believe that as you work through this with God, you'll come out on the other side even more awesome than you already are! Everything that God does (or doesn't do) is out of love for his children. It's the very core of who He is. I'm praying for you!
Post a Comment